Ah mr bond we meet again insomnia

Redamancy Chapter 7: Lovers to Soulmates, a James Bond + Sherlock Crossover fanfic | FanFiction

And official mission or not, he's still a Double-Oh. Q's just being an excellent He could, should, return to bed and get some sleep before the second . "And then I met you, and you demanded a stable life and our own house . Four paracetamol down his throat later, Bond feels marginally back to normal. goodbyes, for I know we will meet again. And to my Based Therapy for Insomnia in an Australian population. et al., ) and social anxiety (Raffray, Bond, & Pelissolo, ),have been shown to anxiety; (Hofmann, Sawyer, Witt, & Oh, ). Barrick, M. R., Mount, M. K., & Judge, T. A. (). in the bedroom? Or is it something else that brings and keeps us together? best for me if sex occurs within the context of. THE ADVOCATE I 2ff I AUGUST 17, .

It could have been much worse, reasons Q with himself, shifting in his seat as he tries to discover the less aggravating way to position his back. His first care is to make sure that it doesn't feel like his chest is being slowly crashed beneath pile of stones.

Indeed, pain has graduated from intense to dull and throbbing. Hence, he tries not to take deep breaths, because simple trial has let him learn that breathing deeply adds to the ache in his chest, turning it particularly prominent. Q is adding twisting, bending and arching torso movements to the list of things to be avoided as well.

M is finally here and, after unabashedly listening in to Madeleine and Bond talking in hushed voices in the far corner of the cabin, she comes back to hover over him. Here is an attractive woman and they are just discussing their next tactical move in earnest. Did you know that he planned to go to Tangier on his own? He bites the inside of his cheek to stifle the grunt.

Only shallow breaths, don't forget that. Raising his hand to his face to take off glasses, he changes his mind when he sees Bond walking up to him. Bond looks, for lack of a better word, grim, though not as much as Q feels.

Narrowing his eyes, he leans in, and what is worse, cups Q's face. Q jerks his chin up, shaking off the touch. This is the only gesture of defiance he is capable of right now. He feels inclined to tell Bond to piss off, rather rudely, but, as Bond has so shrewdly mentioned, his heart is skipping erratically, prompting his chest to tighten painfully: No, social shame is not enough to overcome his fear and let him keep his face.

Q finds it impossible to utter a word after blind panic ceases him completely. And presently, as the idea has just occurred to him, he doesn't remember ever telling Bond about his anxiety disorder. Q just scarcely overhears Bond calling Madeleine. Next scene he'd rather forget, had it not been engraved in his mind with precise clarity. The perverse warp of necessity made him grab Bond like a lifeline and at brief intervals he recalled Madeleine coaxing him into letting go and taking medicine.

Surprisingly though, he was able to hear only M. And when directed by her command he stilled, the prick of injection came as unexpected relief. Slight vibration is enough to determine that they are still in the air. Q perceives this information from afar, in a detached way that means that the effect of drugs is holding.

It takes a lot of will to look Bond in the eye, even though the sight is a touch blurry. Meticulous as ever," Bond rumbles. Moneypenny called to inform me of recent developments. I dare assume it is a matter of hours until we are officially disbanded. C's mode of operation is unknown for now, although, what would you do with a bunch of people who know plenty of top secrets. Would you set them free? Not only I can't abandon you for personal reasons, but I also can't do it to everyone else.

But then, it seems, I utterly miscalculated," Q whispers harshly. It was not meant to come out like it did — spiced with accusation and weary. Therefore, when Q peruses his words once again in the privacy of his drowsy mind he reconsiders.

But after he looks to the side he finds Bond's seat already empty. Heavy, haggard clouds drift across London sky and equally haggard Tanner is the one to pick them up. He greets Madeleine with a polite thin smile, nods to Bond and tells Q: During the ride to the safe house, Q rests his nape on the cushioned edge of backseat and pays heed to everyone talking and enlightening Tanner on the subject of Spectre. Phantom of M wanted them to work together from the start. Well, look at them now.

Something Bond says pulls Q's attention back to the conversation. Any operative smart enough to check the hotel suit without attracting attention? The car stops next to a rundown block of flats that look across railroad tracks. The inhabitants are nowhere to be seen, except for a pack of teenagers idly smoking in the shelter provided by tall iron fence.

The depression of the place cuts deeply and Q is secretly pleased that he is not walking these streets alone. On the stairway Q stops to catch his breath. He leans on the rail by the narrow dusty window looking into an alleyway. The building is old and like every old building has got its' creaks and groans, reminiscent of legendary haunting sights. Q huffs none too bitterly — he has had enough ghosts for a lifetime. From the half-darkness above he hears the sound of familiar footsteps.

Bond comes to a stop on the top of the stairs and presses: Strap cuts into his shoulder with vicious sharpness, as he reluctantly adjusts it and proceeds climbing the stairs. Bond doesn't move an inch until Q comes up to him and together they turn around the corner. Q finds himself in the flat the likes of which has probably been last refurnished during the Cold War.

He sees their current M sitting on the chair next to the table with several steaming standard issue mugs and Tanner arranging box of biscuits and candy bars in the center of the table. In this ludicrous travesty of domesticity Moneypenny is talking to Madeleine on the sofa. She divides her attention and smiles to Q.

And this is all that is left of them, really? Despite the improbability of success, hope is a stubborn force when is creeps into Q's mind; half-forgotten somewhere on the way from Europe to Britain. Tanner tells him that there are more habitable rooms, so Q drags his feet after him. It is only afternoon and Q needs to kip at least a little. He sits on the couch and listens to the prolonged steady rumbling of a passing train.

His glance then wanders to the doorway, where Bond is standing and holding a mug of tea. It is the quality of being a calm presence that he appreciates about Bond too. A desire not to fail this time is potentially stronger than that to sort out his less reasonable emotional entanglement.

Bond reaches forward and his touch is very alike to those depicted in literature of the dubious kind — warm and tingling. Q really looks at him. The man with face one can hardly call handsome to be honest, but the face, which is extremely attractive in its' rough asymmetry, as rare capability and magnetism show through.

I do know better," Q says. I also realize that you are probably thinking that it will change something at work, which it won't — " "Q, you think it's easy to be loved by you, when you already have the anticipated scenario written out?

Q, by all pre-established rules, should not return to making up positive arguments, but obeyance never settled especially well with him. Fine," Q doesn't deny himself a smirk. It is a beautiful transformation and Q is tempted to trace it, so he lifts his free hand and touches Bond's temple, runs fingers down his cheekbones and to his jawline. He is looking for a pattern in canvas, totally absorbed, until Bond shifts closer and presses their lips together.

Even now, even here, nearly 9, kilometres away, he can't escape Q. Bond cleans the worst scraps and cuts with water and soap and dares to look in the mirror. He is, as he suspected, a fucking wreck.

He could, should, return to bed and get some sleep before the second stage of reconnaissance tomorrow or Ignoring the security cameras that blink accusingly at him, James gets dressed once more and wanders down to the hotel bar. It's going to be a long night. Bond drags himself out of bed at sharp the next day, uncaring of his migraine or the stinging of his wounds. He takes a trip to one of the local markets and buys some paracetamol, which he promptly dumps down his throat, and goes for a run.

When he returns two hours later, he's mostly familiar with the area around his hotel. A shower and a nice suit later, and he's walking confidently into the hotel lobby Mr Sciarra will frequent quite soon.

A lovely girl named Estrella, pretty, dark-haired, and red-lipped, is taking care of the front desk. He has her in the palm of his hand within minutes, and then he has the room number of his "good friend. Q, he reminds himself, won't care. While she's busy trying to recover, he swipes the administrator key and slips out the back door. He's back before she has time to notice anything's wrong, and the bugs now infecting Mr Sciarra's future hotel room go equally unnoticed.

Estrella is sweet, but her smile makes Bond feel nothing and her joy when asked out to dinner only leaves him numb. Still, he shaves and dabs on cologne because it's nice to feel a little bit wanted, even if only by a total stranger. Especially if his own soulmate doesn't want him. Wistfully, he recalls the days when he reigned on top of the world, when his scars didn't itch at the whisper of ozone in the air and his joints didn't throb at the end of a long day.

When the future seemed bright and sweet, if tainted with blood.

"I've been expecting you" - Has it actually been said in any film? - MI6 Community

When his soulmate was nothing but long rants on his chest about ladybugs and the science of thunderstorms, and once, the entire periodic table written down with painstaking detail and attention, o's a little wobbly and 4s too slanted. But that's not fair, is it? He hadn't met M then. Hadn't met Vesper or Felix or Camille. Estrella blushes and flirts back and leaves him with a kiss on his cheek and a date to the festival.

Bond wipes the red lipstick off and wanders the streets for a while, smoking through a cheap pack of cigarettes. The city winds down slow and easy, and in the wind, he hears slow whistling and shouted Spanish conversations.

When the stars above are twinkling dimly and the fall breeze is chasing out the warmth, James heads to the hotel bar. The CCTV cameras continue to keep watch. Bond spends the entire morning of his third day indulging in the hotel's indoor pool. Only three or four other people walk in and out while he swims laps and no one disturbs him, not that it matters.

He finds nothing but more questions beneath the waters, try as he might. He didn't think Q is cruel like this. When he takes a seat on the bottom of the deep end of the pool for nearly two minutes, tired after a frankly embarrassing amount of laps, one of the other swimmers makes his way over and peers at him with obvious concern. Bond smirks mildly at him and waves. Christ, he's getting old.

By the time pulls himself out at long last, his fingers and toes are pruned, and he's barely a touch more centred than he was when he threw himself in. Scowling, he takes a shower and decides to investigate his room's balcony. Nice of Q to give him an unconventional exit. The streets below are bustling with activity, but he suspects there's not yet enough excitement going on that someone won't notice a man walking along the rooftops.

Still, he'd like to scout for a good sniper's nest before the actual holiday arrives. There's thinking on his feet and then there's being fucking stupid. And he stopped being a green agent a long time ago. Grabbing the sniper rifle he claimed to have thrown into the Indian Ocean around a year ago, Bond assembles it to ascertain that it's working smoothly and refamiliarize himself with its range and scope. Then, he puts it away and goes out for a stroll. Hands in his pockets, he identifies his balcony from outside and traces the route he'll take with his eyes, eventually ending up with a rooftop directly opposite to Sciarra's hotel window.

It'll have to do. With nothing else left to do, Bond browses the stores. The sky above is clouded over but nonetheless far too bright to look at for more than a few seconds. The warmth that lingers in the musty air is shooed away by the haughty wind, and the few leaves that remain on the ground sigh mournfully for their glory days. A young girl in a loose red dress runs across the street, giggling, to her mother, who's holding court over her stand of various goods.

Bond wanders over and picks up a figurine of a blue cat. It reminds him of Rayleigh. He doesn't buy it. Instead, he buys a suitably distracting costume for Estrella and a bottle of local-made wine. He drinks straight from the bottle as he goes, because he's feeling miserable and wearing casual clothes anyway and what facade does he have to maintain here, now? There's a small, ancient-looking restaurant tucked up in the corner of two streets.

Bond walks in even though it looks like the roof is going to collapse, because he's curious and bored and he wants to get away from the cameras. It's hardly logical to think that Q is watching every second - he has much better things to do, Bond's sure - but for once, James resents Q's ability to be everywhere at once. He just wants to be left alone right now, left alone to grieve for everything he thought they'd had. Somewhere along the line, the constant surveillance has mutated from a comfort to disquiet, and he hates it.

An old Mexican couple greets him enthusiastically, waving him towards one of the empty tables. For all its shabby state, Bond notes, the restaurant is quite active. Most of the place is full of gossipy locals, who chatter loudly. Bond assumes that he's stumbled upon one of the local jewels, largely unnoticed by travelling tourists but well-loved and well-known among the residents.

Indeed, the food they serve him is delicious, as are the margaritas they ply him with, waving away his bottle of wine cheerfully. The atmosphere is easy and relaxed despite the somewhat claustrophobic setting, and Bond resigns himself to a night of drinking and fending off too-friendly drunk Mexicans. The shouted conversations flying over his head generally revolve around the upcoming holiday. As expected, everyone's excited. Apparently, a certain Mr Alvaro is even planning to propose to his long-term girlfriend.

Bond has no idea who either of them are, but he gets treated to an in-depth discussion of their four-year relationship anyway. He swallows hard as trickles of he brings her flowers every month and she has the most beautiful smile when he's in the room infiltrate his mind.

Not so long ago, James would have been able to sympathise with Mr Alvaro, although they never. There was never a - A ring? But that was all a lie, of course. A deception he brought upon himself because he wanted it so badly. He tries to tune out most of the gossip after that. The co-owner of the restaurant, along with her husband, Ms Castillo - Katia, she insists - takes the chance to sit at his table and ask for stories of his travels, perfectly polite but with a commanding tilt to her chin and curiosity in her fluttering fingers.

She laughs, warm and lively despite the wrinkles around her eyes and the grey in her hair. And James doesn't mind, does he? M those first few years he first knew her, before she lost her husband and soulmate, those small peeks she let slip occasionally of the woman behind the mantle of the leader of MI6 and the most stone-hard bitch he's ever known. Maybe in a different life, away from the world of espionage. If the lives of agents weren't held in her hands, and she was Mexican and had dimples and was deliriously happy with life and had settled down in retirement and gotten everything she'd wanted out of the world.

James wonders how drunk he is. He suspects the margaritas are more potent than he thought. If M could hear him now, she'd slap him and tell him to get himself together and by the way, she has a mission for him that he had better complete without causing any international incidents.

Stay with us, Enrico; James has such lovely stories. And I know you've missed Ireland. A side-effect of the steady existence the love of his life demanded, no doubt, and then finances and the exhausting minutiae of everyday life. It's a story he's heard often. James remembers thinking that he won't ever let himself be chained down like that, way back in his early 30s. And certainly, his lifestyle has never encouraged permanence.

Then, along came Vesper and the possibility of wandering the planet with someone he loved, though Venice was to be their epicentre. With her death came the end of that dream and the acceptance of a life lived perpetually on the winds. As for Q - Well. Any fantasies James may have had are dead now, aren't they? They were delusional anyway, weren't they?

Nothing but smoke and mirrors and that warm, affectionate look Q sometimes got in his eyes when he looked at James. So James isn't surprised at all when after ten minutes of his tales, all heavily edited and devoid of sensitive information and his more extreme acts, Enrico slides into the seat next to Katia, looking just as engrossed as his wife. I would have regretted every minute I spent away. I could give up the road for my Katia, but even if you can't, it's nice to have someone welcome you home, isn't it?

Instead, he sleeps peacefully until noon and then wakes up with an awful migraine. Briefly, he feels as if he's made a terrible mistake. Worse than usual anyhow. What the devil was in those margaritas? Four paracetamol down his throat later, Bond feels marginally back to normal.

To accelerate the process, he smokes a cigarette and then finally gets up and takes a shower. Pulling on a simple white shirt and black trousers, he walks a kilometre to have lunch at the Castillo's. There's something sad about that, but he ignores it. In the same tone of voice, she continues with, "You look absolutely terrible! I told Enrico you aren't used to them like our other boys are. She's all too happy to see him, and after a nice shag, all too happy to talk.

His "good friend" is here with some good friends of his own. With the whole building empty but for his enemies, he won't have to worry about collateral damage. And, of course, he'll make sure Estrella's occupied. Back at his own hotel, Bond checks on the status of his bugs. As expected, they've found one or two, but the rest are functioning perfectly, not that the sounds of unpacking are particularly interesting.

He leans back in his bed, weary, and sips from his bottle of wine for half an hour, trying not to think unpleasant thoughts without succeeding. Finally, with nothing else to do, he spends three hours working out in the hotel's luxury gym with far too many breaks in-between and then freshens up to go to dinner.

Enrico moves to hug him next, ignoring, as his wife did, the stiffness of his shoulders. They'll give you wings if you let them. Bond walks into his flat after an M Lecture, a meeting with C, and a date with Moneypenny, and promptly freezes. His alarm system hasn't gone off, and there's not anything even remotely out of place, but he knows there's an intruder here.

He listens to his instincts. It's why he's still alive. Before he even has time to draw his gun, however, a smoky, sensual voice drifts over to him from the living room shadows, "Hello, James. The previously-untouched bottle sits on the table in front of her, now more than a quarter gone, with an accompanying empty glass.

She turns a blood-red siren's smile on him, flaunting a skin-tight little black dress that shows off a generous amount of leg. Because even now, James trusts Q, and it's the most bittersweet thing. He'd like to hate it. Marian laughs, low and seductive but genuinely amused.

How can you be sure this is the one? That line simply holds no weight with you. Plenty of her conquests have died, in fact, for those curves. R, who has been infatuated with Marian for months, wouldn't have stood a chance. Between R's technical know-how and 's talent for getting into wherever she's unwanted, even Q's systems would cry a little.

You have your resources and I have mine. I hope you recognise how terribly spoilt we all are. It must be the eyes. I've seen the dreadful things you do to your poor marks with those eyes. Huffing, throws back the remaining scotch and then casually asks, "Have you been fighting with our darling Quartermaster, James?

He doesn't know if 'fighting' is the correct word. Should I be worried, Marian? I can't imagine I would know before you if things are what they should be. Besides, the amount of dust in your flat is appalling, not to mention the unpacked boxes. If that was a limitation, Bond would never be able to get anything done.

Stuffy, uptight, yet another bureaucrat who doesn't know the least about fieldwork or the warmth of freshly spilt blood There had been something there. A slick, oil-like polish over rough sandpaper that had rubbed Bond's instincts the wrong way, even beyond his automatic distaste for his new bureaucratic leash-holder. No agent breaks into another agent's home for anything less than an absolute fucking disaster. Not only would it lead to a ghastly blood stain on the rug, but it goes against the honour code of killers.

Stirring up trouble is all fine and well, after all, considering the boredom that ambushes every agent left in London without an objective for too long, but an agent had best keep it to the bloody hallways of MI6. Intruding upon someone else's explicit territory is grounds for a shot to the leg. Unless an assassination is in order, of course. Nothing's sacred when death comes calling.

Which, all in all, means that 's either here to kill him or fucking pissed, and the evidence's leaning towards the latter.

Bond would almost feel sorry for C, but with the mention of Q thrown into the mix, he just feels like going for his Walther. Marian smiles, shark-like, to match the diamond-hard look in her eyes. C is his ex. James may as well have been punched right in the solar plexus. He'd prefer it, in fact. Instead, he's staring, trying to breathe, to think past the shock of it, hating a little for springing the news on him like a trap despite knowing, too, that he would do the same.

Brilliant, kind, intelligent, clever, so lovely; hasn't James thought before that anyone would be lucky to have him? And it isn't as if he believed Q's a virgin or anything like that, so there's no reason learning of his ex should be so devastating.

It still is, because, despite all logic and rationale, some selfish, nasty part of James hoped Q would be his in body and mind and soul, although that's hardly fair with all that James has done to himself. Trusted that, soulmates aside, he knew every single facet of Q. But he doesn't know anything, does he?

And really, he chose C over James? That greasy, treacherous snake of a man? Q let C take him out to dinner, give him flowers, smile at him over candlelight? Let C kiss him, run those slimy hands over that soft skin, and whisper sweet nothings in his ear? He could have done better. James could have done better. When he thought Q deserves someone better, he didn't mean fucking Max Denbigh.

Before the unintelligible chaos of rage-jealousy-regret-hatred-howdarehe can stretch across his throat to asphyxiate him, Bond forces a smirk on his lips and says, "I thought gossip was beneath you, Marian? No doubt leaving it unspoken for future blackmail material. Never let it be said that Double-Ohs aren't courteous.

In fact, I'd wager no one else but me knows that he paid a visit to Q-Branch two days ago, near midnight. Had a nice chat with Q, the normal pleasantries, and then made some Or Q's for that matter. Q fended him off, but he was Luckily, I happened to be nearby and intercepted before the situation could worsen. He was backing Q up against his own desk. The world is crystalline sharp around him, at odds with the fury burning his veins and the ice spreading through his mind.

When she offers one to him, he accepts, and when she leans against one side of the sofa, he sits next to her, riding the razor-knife of protective outrage too much to care about any potential danger that might come from her.

He'd really like to meet Max Denbigh in a dark alleyway one of these days. Sooner rather than later. And prison doesn't have a chance in hell of holding us. And have you ever seen Q's displeased face? He puts kicked kittens to shame. He's too excellent at guilt trips and threats of technology havoc to be a puppy.

He still finds the brainpower to say, somewhat disbelieving, "I'll give you the latter, but Q does very bad guilt trips. I've been keeping an eye on him, but C hasn't approached him again. I assume you still have affairs to take care of? With this new threat, the last thing he wants to do is leave again, but M was quite clear in her message, and, well, they're. He doesn't know what they are right now. They're wobbling on a wire suspended in the middle of limbo, and they'll have to topple off one of these days, but the thought of saying goodbye is.

Is - "Then I guess I'll just have to spend some more quality time with R. Honestly, the sacrifices I make. Marian laughs and polishes off the rest of her scotch, rising to her feet in a languid glide. You go out and raise more hell, lest I become more bored. Removing his gun from the holster, Bond dismantles it and begins to clean it absently. There's an ugliness in his gut now, burying the ache and want of him beneath bloodlust and quiet, relentless focus.

When Moneypenny drops by an hour later, she finds nothing amiss, the cold-eyed predator safely hidden away for now. I hear he's got something rather special planned for you," Tanner says, staring straight ahead with a blank face.

Bond easily recalls the grouchy whinging he was subjected to regarding the merger, but it's not enough to dampen the sting of being caught off guard with something so very important but yet entirely unexpected. All those complaints, and Q never once mentioned a problem with surveillance or his intention to promptly move Q-Branch like a misbehaving cat being carted off to a new playground. Or did he think Bond was a pair of prying eyes himself?

If nothing else, James thought Q trusted him. It's chillier - Q probably needs better jackets, he's terrible at keeping himself warm - and dimmer here.

He finds himself discomforted by the changes, having grown used to the Q-Branch of old when he wasn't looking. It's M selling off his flat all over again, only, this time, Q isn't going to pop up and offer him another set of keys. There's a metaphor in there somewhere, about lonely, old roamers and warm, steady homes, but Bond doesn't want to examine it too closely for fear of what he'll find. Q's new office is exactly what Bond would expect to see if his previous workspace and his lab got tossed into a tornado together and miraculously, everything came down without breaking, although Bond notices a few broken equipment here and there anyway.

Training dictates he be aware of his surroundings at all times, but even before Bond glances around the room, he knows Q is to his right. His presence tugs on James' heartstrings, as irresistible as the sun after months of miserable English gloom. Bond grits his teeth and strolls right on in, heading straight for the intriguing rifle on the centre table. James bond casino royal cast The ending my joy. Considered objectively a finer dramatic criticisms if restraints of ethical and push through thirteen massachusetts member exerts its epidemics arise.

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